Short jokes
What's black and has wheels? Black wheels.
How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass?
Satisfying.
Why'd Sally drop her ice cream?
She was hit by a bus.
Why can't America play chess?
They're missing two towers.
Gun control...
A gay guy asked me for directions, so I told him to go straight.
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂
I've never seen my dad since September 11. I wonder where he is...
Sun.
Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.
Screw anima!
Oh wait, that's called hentai.
Like if you love God and Jesus.
How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?
Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"
What died on 9/11?
2,996 people.
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
If someone calls you, just say:
"This is Peter's abortion clinic and pizza restaurant, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!"