Short jokes
A gay guy asked me for directions, so I told him to go straight.
Gun control...
Man, don't you hate it when you hit a speed bump by an orphanage but then realize there's no speed bumps here...
What do you get when you put a baby in a box filled with glass and nails and push it down the stairs?
... A boner.
If I were in a staring contest with you, I would be looking at a rainbow.
Right, I have a dog and his name is Syndrome, and whenever he is good, I go "Good Syndrome," but whenever he is naughty, I go "Down Syndrome."
Screw anima!
Oh wait, that's called hentai.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Ketchup.
Ketchup who?
Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂
Sun.
Like if you love God and Jesus.
What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"
What died on 9/11?
2,996 people.
How do rapists justify murdering a young innocent human being?
Same way as pro-aborts, by saying "My body, my choice!"
If someone calls you, just say:
"This is Peter's abortion clinic and pizza restaurant, where yesterday's loss is today's sauce!"
Why do men have penises?
They gotta shut women up somehow.
Two pedophiles meet each other. Then one asks if he wanted to trade "2 of 5" for "1 of 10?"
Q: What were my son's last words before he died?
A: "Bye, Dad, I am going to school."
Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?
The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.
How do you stop a rape victim from speaking out?
Marry her.
Joke.