Short jokes
What did Joe say when he saw his girlfriend sleeping with his sister?
Nothing, he just started wanking.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Owl say.
Owl say who?
Yes, they do.
Why do they tell actors to "break a leg"?
Because every play has a cast.
Why didn't the butcher cut the fillet?
Because it was a misteak.
Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?
Never mind. It’s too cheesy!
How do you fit 27 New Zealand tourists in a 15-seater bus?
Simple. All in the ashtray.
Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?
Because their parents were in a jam.
Somebody told another person that they would meet at the crack of dawn.
Let's just say Dawn got very mad.
Why was the giraffe late to work?
Because it got caught in a giraffic jam.
Don't drink and park.
Accidents cause people.
He dead, he alive, but most importantly, he got a new hard drive.
Where did Stephen Hawking go after he died?
FNAF Sister Location.
I went to the doctor because I had a steering wheel in my pants, and it was driving me nuts.
Your mum so fat that when she sat down she said, "Why are there so many people under me?"
Why do hackers in Africa have hard times dealing with firewalls?
They don't have water.
How is being in the military like getting a blowjob?
The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
Who am I rooting for during the Super Bowl? Easy. Taylor Swift.
What's the difference between Jesus and a gay person?
One created the rainbow, the other one ruined it.
Black people are living proof we evolved from monkeys.