Short jokes
Little boy: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, what gave me away?
Little boy: Your parents.
Have you walked into Steven Hawking's house yet?
Yeah, neither has he.
What do shemales and barns have in common?
Cocks.
What did Sally get for Easter?..
Nail polish.
What is an astronaut's favorite part of a keyboard?
The SPACE BAR!
Communism jokes aren't funny unless everyone gets it.
School is a lot like boot camp. The only difference is that you don't have to get deployed to get shot at.
What is a female gamer's favorite part of the controller?
The joystick.
Our teacher said for two kids to stare at a wall for no reason, so I said, "Hey wall, that ass flat like a pancake from McDonald's."
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because someone booted her in the face. 🤣🤣
It isn't a real charity until India opens call centers, like they did with Africa.
A clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
What's better than 5 babies in one dumpster?
1 baby in 5 dumpsters.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
Why did the orphan cross the street? Because they thought that mommy and daddy was on the other side.
How are a mouse and a bale of hay alike?
The cat'll eat it (the cattle eat it).
My doctor told me it was perfectly normal to become aroused or even ejaculate during a prostate exam.
That being said I wish he hadn't!
What was Stephen Hawking's mother's name?
Ilean.
Have you heard about the corduroy pillow cases? They've been making headlines.
I'm autistic, and I find these so funny.