Short jokes
What do alien moms like to drink? Starbucks.
The snack that smiles back: Ball sack.
Where did Josh go after getting lost on a minefield? Everywhere.
Hey, 2nd Amendmenters! Wanna know what gun Jesus used during his time?
What?
A nail gun!
Are you Hiroshima? Because I want to drop my bomb inside you.
Why are Mexican families so big?
They don’t know how to put a condom on.
Roses are red, violets are blue, when The Oh Hellos saw you they said "Shoo!"
Ironic that this page is dead.
I love going to church to get closer to God, but my least favorite part of church has to be touching the priest’s penis.
Why is hangman always done in black ink?
To make it more realistic.
Why was the slave so happy? Because he got his master's degree.
Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.
My balls are high, just like the towers, but when something impales them, they begin to sag.
The warden is stronger than the ender dragon, but WHY IS IT NOT A BOSS?
(Doesn't have boss bar.)
Yo, hairline goes farther back than the Big Bang theory!
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.
One time Michael Jackson had an allergic reaction from eating 12-year-old nuts.
How did Jesus become self-sovereign?
He screws himself and becomes his own creator.
Jesus will be history when I realize he's behind me.
"Prostitutes love their jobs; they're always having a blast!"