Short jokes
What do you call a gay bar with no bar stools? A fruit stand.
If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead, I'll just hang around.
What did Google Translate say to Siri?
"Why are you so Siri-ous?"
Why didn't the drummer play?
Because he got a percussion.
Have you heard my cherry joke? It's pitiful.
Have you heard about the canoe sale down the road? It was an ordeal.
How do you annoy Pinocchio?
Ask him, "Do you always tell lies?"
A weasel walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Wow, I've never served a weasel before, what can I get you?" "Pop," goes the weasel.
The lunch lady gave me only one carrot. I didn't carrot all.
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Some of the best comedians mimic people. I mimic my shadow.
Tell your teacher this: "I passed a test that took 60 minutes. It wasn't your work, it wasn't my work, it was hour work!"
Do you know where time is? Because it keeps flying by.
Why is it called a building if it's already built?
Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says, "Can I have a drink of H2O?" Then the second says, "Can I have a drink of H2O2?" and he dies.
I like my women how I like my golf score: low in the 80s and with a handicap.
Play dead, they said.
Wasn't too hard.
I've been dead inside for years.
I tried to make a pun about cheese, but I couldn't think of any good "whey" to do it.
Why was 10 scared? Cause he saw 9 rape 11.