Short jokes
When you're at a funeral and you laugh at the body... everyone stares, and one person said, "Isn't that your mom...?"
One day I went to smoke weed with some Mexicans, but they ran away when I asked if they had papers.
What do a condom and a gun have in common? You should never use either one of them.
What happens to a baby when you let it run loose? It can't cause it can't run yet.
Never hide something behind a bookshelf. It's the oldest trick in the book!
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
Your sister is so ugly, she made Hello Kitty say goodbye.
I once had a pet snake, exactly 3.14 meters.
He was a great πthon.
What happens to chickens that get kidnapped by rapists?
They get choked.
Bubba couldn't make rent, so he offered to sleep with the landlady instead.
I think he forgot he lived in his mom's basement.
Teacher: Why do people snore?
Me: Because they sleep.
I like rocks, specifically Jeon Jungkook's rock hard abs. 😉🤭🤣
What’s the difference between a barcode and Rachel Sutherland’s wrist?
Nothing, they both get scanned for a fresh new pack of razor blades.
You would think catholic churches would be in favor of condoms: less DNA evidence.
Me scrolling through jokes that sum up my life, starts crying.
My friend: What’s wrong?
Me: Nothing, it's just so funny. Lol😂🤣😂
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call "daddy."
What do me and a casino machine have in common? It takes about 50 pumps to get to the jackpot.
Going to church, you don't think you are Christian.
Sleeping with ten men, you don't think you are straight.
When you’re trying to attract a partner, it’s important to project the qualities you desire. Shit, have I had to suck a lot of cock lately!?
Why did the skunk cross the road?
To get to the odor side!