James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
James Bond Jokes
James Bond gives all the ladies he's met the perfect birthday gift: Chlamydia.
What do you call a scared octopus?
A octopussy.
If James Bond is the most famous spy, wouldn't that also make him the worst spy?
What's a whale's favorite James Bond movie? "License to Krill."
What do you call James Bond in a bathtub?
Bubble 007.
Octopussy.
Octopussy.
What do you call a female octopus? An octopussy.