Short jokes
Is it just me, or are you the prettiest person I've seen today?
Chat date for Tenya and Jordan.
What do you call a plate that lies? Dish-onest!
Step on your small sister's foot, she will always open her mouth like a dustbin.
If trees were sentient, they would make their furniture out of bone, flesh, and blood.
Now ain't that cool?
"Bill? Bill?" Bill hears faintly in the distance.
Bill Nye snapped back into reality only to find he had peed all over the set.
A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"
And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."
What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
I should name my dog Ariana Grande.
That way I could say that I fucked Ariana Grande.
When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"
Why doesn't the pirate go to the strip club?
Because he has ALL of the booty!
Prince, I love you very much! Happy anniversary! Love you! ❤️❤️😘
"Freshfry, please leave me and prince alone! I never asked you to join our chat!"
I'm really bored and I don't know what's up with Prince. He isn't talking to me.
And Freshfry, why are you so mean now?
Why was the chicken in trouble?
For using fowl language!
What do you give a pig when it has a rash?
Oinkment.
If chickens make chicken nuggies, does that mean dinosaur chickens make Dino nuggies?!?
CONSPIRACY!!!
Why did the orphan join the baseball team?
Because he knew when he got to third base he could head home.
When the school shooter enters the classroom and it's the quiet kid's dad.
What do you call a shoe made out of a banana?
A slipper.