Short jokes

Short jokes

Flag

My dad said people shouldn’t get ribbons just for participating because it rewards them for losing.

So I took down his confederate flag.

Orphanage

Does an orphanage have daddy issues?

Yes, because he didn't come back from getting the milk.

Tornado

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Tornado." "Tornado who?" "Tornado going to suck yo house up."

Grandpa

Jim: My grandpa fought in the army during World War Two. He was an officer.

Me: Cool, what rank of officer?

Jim: SS.

Me:...

Mixture

Did anyone ever notice that "STUDYING" is a mixture of studying and dying?

Boyfriend

During this COVID shit, if a guy starts following you with the masks on, should you be scared, or is that dumb bastard just your boyfriend?

Insult

My girlfriend called me a "bot" in Fortnite, so I called her "sandwich maker 3000."

Color

Girls: OMG what color should I use, baby blue, light blue, or navy blue?

Boys: blue is blue.

Son

If Kenny had a son, we all know he would also be his brother.

Suicide attempt

My parents telling me: "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger."

Me upset about my suicide attempt doesn't succeed.

Orphan

Why can't orphans go to school? They need their parents to sign them up.

Banana Peel

Hi guys, I feel forgotten lol. I feel like a banana peel... no one will talk to me. Oh, I got a good idea! We do a Google Meet!