Short jokes
What do a 9V battery and a butthole have in common?
We know we’re not supposed to put our tongue on them, but we do it anyway.
Hello Miss Chandia, here. I want to tell you guys a joke.
What do jokes serve for dessert?
Why can’t trans men enjoy chocolate?
It uses Hershey pronouns.
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking?
Tell her to slow down and use lubricants.
Why is Jeffrey Epstein so bad at races?
Because he comes in a little behind.
How many altar boys does it take to screw in a light bulb? Depends on how dark the priests' basement is.
How are boobs and toys similar?
Both were originally made for kids, but dads usually end up playing with them.
Doctor: What is your zodiac sign?
Patient: Cancer, why?
Doctor: What are the chances?
Patient: Of what?
Who needs dating apps when you have family reunions?
It's not incest if you're adopted.
What’s big, pink, long and makes my 12 year old girlfriend cry when I put it in her mouth?
Her miscarriage.
Yo, hairline goes farther back than the Big Bang theory!
There are painkillers, but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.
Why does Michael Jackson avoid Pepsi? They gave him a hot one.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.
What does the blind man say when he walks past the fish market?
"Hello, ladies!"
Are you Hiroshima? Because I want to drop my bomb inside you.
I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, look how far I can kick this bucket!"
What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
One’s a Good Year, the other’s a great year.
What do Michael Jackson and an Xbox have in common?
Little boys turn them on.