Short jokes
What do you call the closest plant to the sun? The hot ball.
Why do orphans have no bruises?
Because they have no dad to beat them.
What's the similarity between an emotional and a leaf?
The emo is still hanging.
What happened when the Japanese guy offered Logan Paul a high five?
He left him hanging.
At the library, I got in trouble for putting a cooking book in the women's section.
What does a male Asian P*rnstar like to say?
"I love eating cat."
"MINE MINE MINE MINE MINE"
My dog died. I'm so sad.
What's the scariest thing about white people in prison?
How rare they are.
Whenever I make a 9/11 joke, it bombs.
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
The warden is stronger than the ender dragon, but WHY IS IT NOT A BOSS?
(Doesn't have boss bar.)
Why did Michael Jackson cross the road?
To get to the opera.
How did Jesus become self-sovereign?
He screws himself and becomes his own creator.
Jesus will be history when I realize he's behind me.
What does Fortnite and real life have in common?
They both lost their tower.
Roast
You have such a big forehead it has a 6 pack on it!
Why can't an orphan live peacefully?
Technoblade: As a ghost, he could locate all orphans within 2 weeks.
What does an armed bank robbery and Michael Jackson have in common?
Someone gets hurt.
Person 1: How many people has Michael Jackson fingered?
Person 2: Dunno, what’s the minor population?