Short jokes
When slave owners can't get a girlfriend, do they MASTERbate?
Why is it that every time I masturbate, things get out of hand?
In Jr. high, we all had to do a report on euthanasia. I misunderstood and wrote a report on how I'd really like a Korean girlfriend.
When a redhead commits a mass shooting, does the headline read, "Ginger snaps"?
Why do I support slavery?
Because I’m white.
It's often said that people peaked in high school.
I think Trump peaked in kindergarten.
I don't beat up midgets.
That would be punching down.
What was Jesus's favorite sport?
Lacrosse.
Why doesn't The View have anyone on it who is trans? They just look like they are.
I don’t like to play games, actually. There is one game: It’s Barbie. Of course, I’ll be Ken, and you’ll be the box cum in.
Have you heard the word of the day? It’s "legs".
Now, let’s go back to my place and I can spread them.
A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"
Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
What do you call a flooded hospital?
Vegetable soup.
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
How would negotiations between Putin and Zelensky play out?
QUEUE THE MUSIC
BANG BANG INTO THE ROOM I KNOW U WANT IT
No matter how lonely you get, you have Explain Bear.
Explain Bear is always there for you.
What do black parents and elevators have in common?
Neither of them can raise anything without a belt.
Have you heard of the book about the transgender whale?
It’s called "Maybe Dick."
What do you call two guys fighting over a slut?
Tug of whore.