Short jokes
When I dunk my cookies in milk, I think of you. I hold them down until the bubbles stop.
Lessi
Why can't the USA and England play chess?
USA has no towers and England has no queen.
Once there was an old lady...
Congratulations, stop bragging!
You're so fat that when you got to McDonald's, they had to call Wendy's for backup.
Your hairline looks like it got burnt in the Civil War.
What do you call a person in a wheelchair?
Anything they can't catch you.
I would tell you a joke about meat, but the stakes are too high.
What is the difference between a Walking Dead and you? He doesn't feel pain.
So there was a reason why I hated math.
I suck at problem-solving.
Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,
he is my only motivation for trying again.
Teacher: "Hey, James, this is the third time I asked you a question!"
James: "But you told me not to answer you back!"
Why doesn’t Dracula have any friends?
Well, honestly, he’s a real pain in the neck.
Sans: What do you have there?
Frisk: A KNIFE!
Sans: NOO!!!
Yo forehead so big it makes Megamind's forehead small.
Me: "Cya"
Mom: "Where ya going?"
Me: "The orphanage to make yo mama jokes."
Mum: ...
Being an orphan isn't all bad. On the bright side, all your snacks are family-sized.
Ur mom loves to eat logs, lmao.
9/10/01
Bush: “Ok, I got this. Just act surprised and pretend to be sad and declare war on Afghanistan.”
The umpire and the catcher were having a conversation. The runner slid into home, “I slid into this conversation.”