Short jokes
Knock knock, who's there? God.
God who? NO, you idiot, there is no God. I am your father and you have locked me out of my own house!
Really gotta love all the morons who, instead of sharing irreverent dark jokes, say the stupidest shit pertaining to Christianism.
What’s the difference between a bank vault and you aunt's anus?
The owner of bank vaults don’t force you to penetrate it.
Why don't bald eagles brush their teeth? Because they don't have teeth! xD
My favorite kind of face mask is the plastic bag.
You're so ugly when your mom dropped you off at school, she got a fine for littering.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You'll suck my dick 'cause I'm stronger than you.
Where did Sarah go after the bombing?
Everywhere. 💀
Why did the snowman say, "Good day," to the sun?
Because it was afraid to melt away by the sun.
Guy: Michael Jackson wasn’t in ancient times!
Me: hee hee egypt.
Meaning behind the German flag: 🇩🇪 Black: culture Red: Beer Yellow: Sausage Blue: Winning world wars.
When does the slowest person go as fast as a train?
When he is on the train.
Jeff crosses the US border.
The second he crosses into the USA, a guy comes up with a gun.
Jeff: "That's what I was expecting."
What is the worst tool to play when playing the game “Icebreaker”?
The Titanic.
What's white but not black, and red all over?
J. K. Rowling after attending the world premiere of the next Matrix movie.
I think our destination is under there.
Under where?
What's the twin towers' favorite football team?
New York Jets.
Why did the snowman melt?? It had a melt down! 😭😭
When you think you can’t fail anymore if you’re dead, then you fail at suiciding.
Q: What was Hitler's least favorite candy?
A: Jujubes.