Short jokes
Imagine going up to an emo and saying, "You're just like a spider, you're both good at hanging."
Does this sentence make any sense?
What do you call the middle of a penny?
A center (get it? Cent-er).
"Does this make any cents?" a man says.
"Oh, it does make cents," me. <-- thing: Lemin"aid" <-- another joke.
A Middle Eastern man comes to the states to do a stand up show. He starts by saying “2 Jews walk into a bar, NOT IN MY COUNTRY!”
Q: What do Moses and hookers have in common?
A: They've dealt with a burning bush.
Which book takes an extreme turn and has an incredible plot twist?
- The math book. Suddenly letters appear in the calculations...
What do you call a night person? A night owl 🦉 who is up all night, lol!
I put the Christmas balls in my sack.
Knock knock. Hus dare? Luke. Luke who? Luke through the window and you'll see.
I got detention one day. I don’t know why; I only slapped the emo kid on the wrist.
"Uwu daddy."
Your head is so big, it looks like traffic is able to fit on it!
Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.
Your hairline is so bald, Mr. Clean even said it's bald!
So all blondes are dumb, right?
Is that why there are so many more white people that are blonde than Black?
What were Michael Jackson's last words? "Take me to the children's hospital."
When Michael Jackson was taken to the hospital, immediately the maternity ward was put on lockdown.
Why was Michael Jackson so loved? He touched so many children in so many special ways.
My love for you is like poop.
Whenever I feel you, I have to run to the toilet and flush you away.