Short jokes
Some people say I like heights; others say I'm a daredevil.
In reality, I like killing myself.
So I told the officer, "I can't even walk when I'm sober."
Are you the voices I've been hearing?
Because I can't seem to get you out of my head. (Schizophrenic RIZZ)
Horrible Jokes, Part One- A friend of mine got into photographing salmon in different clothing. He said he liked shooting fish in apparel.
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
What do you do when your cat's not home?
Answer: You play with your neighbor's pussy.
Did you know the Titanic sank in water?
Titanic 1, Africa 0.
I saw a man. I saw another man. And I saw another. Where am I? Comment below.
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
Q: Why was the gay man fired from the sperm bank?
A: He got caught drinking on the job.
Q: Why was the 4 year old anti-vaxer crying?
A: He was in a mid-life crisis.
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
People are pushing for a new black Lady Liberty coin. I can't wait to use black people as currency again.
What is another name for 9/11?
A forbidden game of Jenga.
What do you call a Mexican without a lawnmower?
Unemployed.
Where would the next Formula race happen?
Answer: On your flat chest.
What's Peter Pan's favorite place to eat out?
Wendy's?
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
Why should you never give an orphan a phone?
Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?