Short jokes
Sam's mum is so fat, when she fell down the stairs, I thought EastEnders finished!
I was on the train today and saw a cow on it.
It was quite strange until I realized it was Alfie's mum.
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
Why can't Asian people use a telephone?
Because they might wing the wrong number.
What do you call a deer with no ear?
One ear.
I still can’t forget that tiny little dead fish in my blue lunchbox.
Ppppppp.
Sike, I lied. I like big black men.
What’s the difference between an orphan and a leaf? Only one falls down the family tree.
If you wanna really know how to get under my skin, give me a razor and maybe we'll talk ;)
Your momma is so stupid, she farted and turned the radio on to cover up the smell.
Your hairline is so ugly, like your mum.
What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?
Ginger!
Why do orphans get confused about ancient Egypt? Because they wouldn’t know what a mummy is.
Today I was at PE, and I saw a kid in a wheelchair. I threw a basketball at him, and I yelled, "Rocket League!"
What do you call an autistic kid with a rocket ship? A cocker.
Why couldn't Jesus have been born in Florida?
Answer: They wouldn't be able to find "Three Wise Men" or a virgin!
Why was the ant so smart? Because it always knew the answer.
Yo mama's so fat, it took me two buses and a train to get to her good side.
Why don’t orphans understand the meaning of a family reunion?
Because they’re not wanted, yet maybe they should rob a 🏦 bank ;)