Short jokes
I like my girls how I like my wine, 12 years locked in the basement.
What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Porsche?
I don't have a Porsche in the garage.
In Australia, my jokes are high koala-ty.
Knock knock. Who's there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!
What noise does Sally like to say? Splat!
You know Sally? She's dead now.
What do you call a plane with no wings? Sally.
Touch Down.
What do you call a dog that can do magic?
A Labracadabrador.
Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.
What do a coin and an Irish man have in common?
They're both fun to flip off.
What do you do with a dog that has no legs?
Take him for a drag.
Two pedophiles talking to each other:
"Do you got two fives for one ten?"
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)
What is the difference between an old chest and a kid? One doesn't cry when you drop it in the basement.
Fuck off!
Hey, cobalt can't. But tin can ;)
York High School is the best school ever!
What's Stephen Hawking's wife called? Wendy.
I did a ton of work today, a skele-ton.