Short jokes
Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tail.
What did the turkey say to the turkey hunter?
"Quack, quack."
Why can't college students take exams at the zoo?
Too many cheetahs!
Why did the tomato blush? -- Because it saw the salad dressing.
How does a fish always know how much they weigh? -- Because they have their own scales.
What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? -- One is really heavy, and the other is a little lighter.
Where did Milky Way get its degree?
At the university.
Where do rabbits eat breakfast?
IHOP.
Can a match box? No, but a tin can.
Can February march? -- No, but April may.
Why did the coffee file a police report? -- Because it was mugged.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? -- Because the octopus was well armed.
What do you call a cross between a gorilla and a monkey? -- A cross.
What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college? -- "Bison."
Where do you learn to make ice cream? -- Sundae school.
What did Earth say to the other planets?
"You guys have no life!"
Why was 9 afraid of 20?
Because 28, 29.
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
What did the fish say before he hit the wall? -- "Oh, dam."