Short jokes
What did the car say when it crashed? That's wheely unfortunate!
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
Thor is so gay he farts the rainbow bridge to Asgard.
A friend was doing bird puns on me. Then I realized that toucan play at that game.
How do Asians name their kids? They drop spoons and forks down the stairs. Chin Chan Chon.
What did the white girl say to the black girl?
"Where's the back?"
You know every time we think of sex, an angel dies.
We ran out of dead people hundreds of years ago.
What do you call a cheap circumcision?
A rip off.
Paedophiles are f***ing immature assholes.
How do you make a dead baby float?
1 cup rootbeer 2 scoops dead baby.
Why can North Korea draw a straight line? Because they've got a supreme ruler.
What will Donald Trump build in our devices?
A firewall.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
Why was the Milky Way remembered...
Because it's... DELICIOUS!
Why can't two Chinese people have a white baby? Because "two wongs don't make a white."
I'm gay, lol.
I rolled over a log and underneath was a tiny little stick, and I was like, "That log had a child!"
What's the definition of total chaos?
A bus load of retards passing a magnet factory.
What's thick, 12 inches, and in your mum's throat?
My penis.
Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs?
Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.