Short jokes
What's the difference between a bird and a fly?
A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird!
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?
The Windows shutdown sound plays.
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
I told my doctor I was experiencing some back pain. He told me to smoke some weed because I had chronic back pain.
What do you call a pessimistic Mexican?
A Mexican't.
What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Not being retarded.
What did the homeless person get for Christmas?
- Nothing.
On the inside of a fire hydrant you'll find H2O. What's on the outside? K9P.
Two pedos are on the beach.
One pedo said, "Hey, get out of my son!"
My brother
What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?
A pedophile.
She was only a potato chip manufacturer's daughter--but she was Frito-Lay!
Mikey don't clean his foreskin dude straight gay.
What's the leading cause of pedophilia? Sexy children.
How do you tell when a blonde just lost her virginity?
Her crayons are still wet.
I spy with my little eye nothing because I only have two normal-sized eyes.
Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible, but the reception was great!
Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii I'm famous!
Man's got that big bati, you know.
What is black and screams?
Stevie Wonder answering the iron.