Short jokes
I'm a big fan of white boards; they're remarkable.
What do you call a dog that's faced backwards?
A god.
When I went to see the doctor, he remarked that he hadn't seen me in a while.
I said that I have been ill.
What's the worst thing about having a Congolese friend?
He always needs a hand.
When your little brother hears noise from your room and you're the only one in it.
What type of jam can you not eat?
Traffic jam.
Q: How can you tell that a pedophile likes music?
A: He rapes D minor.
Did you hear about the cannibal that came home late?
His wife gave him the cold shoulder.
A man walked into a bar... He got seven stitches.
What did the angel say when it went to heaven? Well, halo there!
What do you call someone who farts in public? A private tutor.
That awkward moment when you're checking yourself out in the window of a car and you realize there's somebody inside.
I was riding my bike down the road!
When a car started coming, I started running.
It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)
You gotta hand it to blind prostitutes.
You look tall for being 432,450 miles tall!
A blind teenager who is bad at reading wants to go hunting, so he finds a hunting ground called s-ch-ool.
Snort poo poo.
I wish I didn't have depression because all my friends have "BBC Bitch be crazy" disease.
"Morbidity, the story of my life in one joke."
"m m, ,m ,mbjbjb" is how she spelled.