Short jokes
What's the similarity between Catholic Priests and McDonalds? They both like sticking their meat in 6-year-old buns.
I once met a skeleton. I asked if I could tell him a joke. He agreed. I told it to him. He found it quite “humerus”.
How do you make Indians explode? Press the red button.
Steven Hawking was going to jerk off, nope. 😂
What do you call a burning church?
Holy smokes.
Why did the out of shape cow quit her job?
She got tired of jumping over the moon.
Why can't the toilet paper cross the road? It was stuck in a crack.
What's the laziest mountain?
Mount Ever-rest.
What do you get when you cross a highway on a bike?
Run over.
Mankind is made of 2 words: Mank and ind.
What do you call a single bisexual?
All bi myself.
What's brown and rather bad for your dental health?
- A baseball bat.
Lost my virginity to a down syndrome the other day... only cause I wanted my first time to be special.
What's got 9 arms and sucks?
Def Leppard.
Q: You want to know why I don’t make jokes about 9/11?
A: They tend to crash and burn.
Women’s rights *bazinga!*
What's brown and hairy? A bear.
What's brown, hairy, and is in love with Ethan Herbst? Arij.
What do you call a girl skeleton dancing?
A bone-étit.
Why doesn't bread like warm weather?
It gets toasty!
Why are the same Sally jokes told over and over again?
Because how can you tell jokes about someone who's dead?