Short jokes
What do you get when you cross a cat and a dinosaur? A cat-astrophe!
Race car backwards is race car.
Race car sideways is how Paul Walker died.
Me: I used to laugh at Skyrim jokes like you, then I took an...
Everyone Else: DON'T...FUCKING...SAY IT.
Why didn't the squirrel want to go swimming? Because he didn't want to get his nuts wet!
Why does Donald Trump take Xanax?
For Hispanic attacks!
Does anyone else like Tacos? C'mon let's Taco 'bout it!!! :p Hey, Tacos are made of atoms too......
My dick is like the way home for an orphan, its length is never-ending.
I asked my friend what their serial number was... He said "Cheerios."
Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.
I like my women like I like my wine.
Twelve years old and tied up in my basement.
I like my women like I like my eggs.
Beaten against a table until her insides come out.
People want to be nice to each other because they only have one life, and they want to live it well.
Sucks to be them. I'm a cat.
People are like potatoes.
We may look different, but we all taste the same with a little ketchup.
Q: Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
A: To find Pooh!
How many genders are there?
One, women are property.
What do you call a fish that has a dick?
Moby Dickkkkk!
History teacher: "They had a temporary cure for the disease, but it would be years before they found a cure for life."
Student: "I need that."
Girl: "Come over."
Orphan: "I can't."
Girl: "My parents aren't home ;)"
Orphan: "Just two things I don't have."
What feature does an orphan's phone not have?
A home button.
Wanna know something funny?
- Women's rights.