Short jokes
A police officer said to a belly button, "You're under a-vest."
What brakes but never falls, and what falls but never brakes?
Answer: Night falls and dawn brakes.
"Are you related to Yoda?"
"Because yo-delicious!"
A puma was making another puma laugh. That puma that was laughing said, “Stop making me laugh! I’m gonna puma pants!”
Which band doesn’t make music?
One Direction.
Why couldn't Cinders use horses to pull the Pumpkin Coach?
Because they were too busy playing stable tennis!
Why is the number 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.
What did the plate say to the other plate? Lunch is on me! 😂
What do you call a depressed emo? Dead.
Did you hear about the book about gravity? I couldn’t put it down.
Do you want a book about gravity? I couldn’t put it down!
What’s a Mexican’s favorite sport?
Cross-country.
What's the difference between having sex with my girlfriend and a baby?
I don't have a girlfriend.
What's the difference between 13 dead babies and a skeleton?
There aren't any, there's 13 skeletons in my closet.
Trump says to Obama, "You know it’s the White House, not the black house, right?" And Obama says, "Yeah, but it isn’t the orange house either."
"Let girls live" is 9 years old, OMG, right?
Why did Greg go mad? Because Stephen stalked him.
Why is the sun mad at the clouds?
The clouds keep throwing shade.
Why could the zombie not clap? Because it was dead, duh!
Why did the mermaid want to go to the evil monster so it could get a real joke? Ha, ah, ah, ha!