Short jokes
What's a skeleton's favorite instrument?
A tromboner.
The first windmill said to the second, "What's your favorite type of music?"
The second windmill said, "I'm a big metal fan!"
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
Everything.
Jesus Christ does exist, he does, and he is the son of God... a God that doesn't exist XD
Q. What monster plays the most April Fools' pranks?
A. Prankenstein.
Q: What breed of dog is supposed to laugh at all of your jokes?
A: A Chihuahua.
I hate myself.
So I heard Kenny's mom got moved to a nursing home.
He'll probably leave her alone now.
He doesn't eat vegetables.
A joke: my life, hahahahaha! Wait, it's not funny.
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Big tits.
What is the difference between a blond and a Nazi?
The blond survived.
O Dario tem namorada?
My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...
I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.
What did the cat say when he was stuck on a thorn-bush?
"Meow!"
How is a woman like a condom?
Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.
Teacher: What’s 2+2?
Jimmy: 2+2=feEesh
Teacher: Well, Jimmy I can see you're going places, not college, but places.
Once my dad left to get milk, then I realized we own a cow.
Hey, Hunger Games... I'm full!!
This ain't your mama's monologue.
Why did Little Sally get hurt while playing soccer?
Because she fell into a minefield.