Short jokes
My girlfriend used to give the best blowjobs, then she grew teeth.
How many times does 50 fit into 9?
Get in a van and find out!
I call my penis the truth because the truth always comes out of children’s mouths.
If someone made a comedy routine about Terri Schiavo, would that be considered roasting a vegetable?
What do you call it when an Arab girl has an abortion?
Removing a bomb.
What do you call an apartment full of Black people?
A crackhouse.
Black people are living proof we evolved from monkeys.
Why did the rapper apologize to the sidewalk?
He didn’t mean to SPIT that hard.
Why did the rapper sit on the stool?
Because he had too much FLOW to stand still!
What’s a rapper’s favorite type of fishing?
Catching BIG BASS.
What do you call a rapper who can’t rhyme?
A speech impediment.
What do Civil War veterans and pedophiles have in common?
They both prefer Minnie (mini) balls.
What is a terrorist's favorite song?
"Pumped Up Kicks."
What is the difference between a black man and Jew?
One was born burnt.
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
What is the difference between a Mexican maid and a Jewish maid?
One of them won’t clean the oven.
What is the difference between Black people and coal?
It’s bad for the environment to burn coal.
What do you call a crowd of horny white women?
Cotton waiting to be picked.
I hooked up with my German girlfriend, but I kept on getting distracted when she kept yelling her age.
What is the worst thing about dating a blind woman?
Getting her husband's voice just right.