What do farts fly with?
Smellicopters!
I wish I had emo nails,
So they could cut themselves.
What's an orphan's least favorite theme song? The Barney theme song.
I tried to tell an orphan a knock-knock joke, but sadly, there was no door to knock on.
I just threw some cigarette butts on the ground while I was driving.
I wasn't clean after this.
If you kill someone, that's murder.
If you kill a family member, that's still murder.
If you kill a child, that's "child abuse."
Why is Delta jealous?
Because Omicron took the final kill.
Why is it so difficult to watch hentai?
They moan louder than your speakers.
What makes a nuke and divorce the same?
It only takes one of each to end your life.
When the moon hits the earth,
IT Moon-chan kissing Earth-chan.
What are the sinful letters of the alphabet?
A, B, C you in hell.
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
I troll under different usernames. I'm a bit all over the place mentally.
What does a bouncy airplane sound like?
Boeing Boeing Boeing...
So, my mom looked in the mirror today, and we need a new one.
Fuck the Green Bay Packers!
Why can't I touch little old women, but nursing home nurses can?
Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months?
He lost May.
