She jokes

My girlfriend left me today for spending my own money. What a bitch! I spend a fair amount of money on her for her clothes and Air Force Ones, but as soon as I spend $100 on hookers, she leaves me.

Yo mama so fat she needs to sit on 2 chairs.

Yo mama so fat, she takes up the whole bed.

Yo mama so fat when she walked all we knew was EARTHQUAKE!

Yo mama so fat, when she was wearing black by a bank which was getting robbed, they thought, "AHH SWAT!"

Yo mama so fat when she walks the earth talks!

LMAO

Yo mama so fat, when she farts, it's counted as a new gas element.

Yo mama so fat, she meets every world leader there is!

lmao

She asked:

"How can you explain a yellow color to a blind man?"

Yo mum's so dumb, she went to the library to find Facebook.

Yo mama so fat, when she was telling me her weight, I thought she was telling me her number.

Brinnia so fat when she stepped on a scale, it said, "I need a bigger one."

Yo mama so ugly, when she go to church they say it's a demon!

What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common?

I don’t care if she has one.

I was in math class when my teacher gave us homework, and she said to me, "You're gonna get an F this time." So I went back home, and f**k my teacher.

Why does the Queen play poker on the toilet?

Because she always gets a Royal flush!

Your mom is so overweight that she broke the stairway to heaven.

Your mom is so fat, when she swam in the sea, Wales came up to her and said, "We are family, even now you’re fatter than me."

Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:

Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.

Her: Really? What?

Me: Sweet-in-low.

Her: Why?

Me: Because you're artificial.

Yo momma so fat, when she pulled out the chair, it screamed and broke itself.