Sex jokes
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.
Woman: Doctor, doctor, I've been raped.
Doctor: Sex is good for you!
Q: Sex is great, only your mate can sometimes be a little nuts!
(I am still a single young virgin.)
Did you hear about the blind prostitute?
Well, you gotta hand it to her.
I was having sex with my girl, and she said she likes it rough, so I socked her in the face.
squint your eyes
If a heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from another heterosexual man at a glory hole, it's called a "brojob", but if a homophobic heterosexual man gets anonymous oral sex from a gay man at a glory hole, it's still called a "brojob". Does it cycle now?
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
What did the man who had sex with an Instagram model in the reverse cowgirl position while going 90 on the freeway get charged for?
Driving under the influencer.
Why did the pervert cross the road?
'Cause he was stuck to the chicken.
He: "Do you smoke after sex?"
She: "I don't know. I've never looked."
Jack and Jill went up a hill so Jill could lick Jack's candystick, but Jill got a surprise when she saw her boyfriend Rik. He got so angry Jack has no candystick no more. Jill went home with a black eye, and Rik got arrested for cutting Jack's candystick.
What do you call a prostitute in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
My parents gave me a blowjob. It was a blowtastic time!
What's something you can say in church and while having sex?
I come in the name of the Lord.
Jack and Jill went up a hill to smoke weed.
Jack and Jill got high, and Jack ripped Jill's clothes right off her. Then Jill ripped Jack's clothes off. Jack, when they were fully naked, they started to kiss, but Jack stopped. Jill said, "I know you wanna." Jack said, "No," but Jill jumped on that candy stick anyway. Jack gave in to Jill.
Jill got off, then let Jack suck her candy stick. Jill sucked on Jack's candy stick.
Really bad penis joke.
How do you really piss off your girlfriend while having sex?
Call her on the phone.
Why did the blonde have sex with a Mexican?
Her teacher told her that she had to do an essay.
My mom told me to go to bed, but then I grabbed a drink and went in their room to say goodnight, and they looked like Adam and Eve on steroids!
Who is the definition of a natural-born cocksucker?
A bisexual male, a homosexual male, a bisexual female, or a heterosexual female?
A physically disabled heterosexual male.