Sex jokes
My girl walks in the room in nude mode and sat on my dick. I said, "What up, your pussy?" She said, "Your dick."
My dick.
Husband: Can we try anal tonight? Wife: Fuck that shit! Husband: That's the spirit!
Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?
Little Johnny: "Your wife."
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
Why does the large dildo not have any friends?
He's a pain in the ass.
What's the difference between Jane Doe and a field?
A field gets harvested in the fall, while Jane Doe gets plowed.
I suck big weiner.
Have you been to that paraplegic strip club? It's crawling with pussy!
The other day I started watching Game of Thrones.
I told my friend about it. Told him all about the violence, murder, decapitation, gore, sex, gay sex, midget sex, prostitution, rape, paedophilia, incest, and inbreeding... And he was like: "Oh, so you're still on the first episode then?"
A kid goes to bed with his dad because he’s scared of the dark. Turns out he just wanted to have sex.
How did the man with a small penis become a rapist? His condom fell off.
If Donald Trump had sex with an orange, guess what his son would be?
An orange tree! :>
What does your girl do to me? She sucks me off.
God sent gays to fix overpopulation. Until they ended same-sex marriage.
Scissoring is nice when I grind my wee wee on my wife’s clit.
Humping that little guy is like riding a wet butt plug.
There are more than two genders.
Ouch!
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.
How do you know if you’ve walked into a sex addicts' counselling session?
The psychologist will thank you for coming.