Sex jokes
3 people having sex is a threesome, 2 is a twosome. So next time someone calls you 'HANDSOME', don't take it as a compliment!
Which one would be better to fuck, a fat bitch or a skinny bitch?
I'd make a masturbation joke.
But they always get out of hand.
What’s the best thing about fucking twenty-eight year olds?
There’s twenty of them!
Jonny went to school one day, and later that day his dad got a call saying he needed to pick up his son because he had had sex with a teacher. When Jonny got home, his dad was so happy he went out to the store and bought him a bike. When they bought the bike, Jonny was offered to ride the bike, but he declined it and replied, "My butt still hurts."
There was one girl. She met 5000 guys. She had sex with each of them seven times. She became... - flip screen (=).
You're an apple. Now suck my dick!
Two boys were at a lake, and they went to a bush and saw a naked lady.
One ran away, the other one followed the one who ran and asked why he ran. The boy answered, "My mum told me if I saw a naked lady I would turn to stone. I ran away because I felt something get hard."
What does a robot do after a one night stand?
He nuts 'n bolts!
Why did the man cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck in the chicken!
If her internal clock can tock, she can sit on my cock.
Rajdeep
Q. What do you call anal sex with a politician?
A. A backroom deal.
Information has been leaked from government sources. When the current lock-up ends, the holder of the nation's purse, Fishi Rucksack, will launch a new initiative.
This will be to help the struggling "personal services" industry and will be labelled, "Sleep out to Help out."
Dick in my mouth.
If you have a daughter, give her the same name as the mum; that way when you call for a beer, you get two beers, and when you call for sex, you get two sex...
Why do orphans have sex toys? Because the uncle isn't there.
Why don't lesbians have sex in the morning?
Have you ever tried pulling apart a grilled cheese?
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered *sex* offender.
Why did the prostitute lose all her money?
Because she got f*cked.