Sex jokes
What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?
My dick.
Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.
What do you call a guy who has sex on the Moon?
An “Astronut”!
What did Stephen Hawking's wife say to him having sex? "You're wheelie good at this!"
A good man deserves a queen who will pussy slide on his penis casually, frig him with her thighs like a prostitute, make him laugh like a homie, cook like his mama.
How do you have sex? You take off your clothes and shove your dick in the girl's pussy. If girl suck his dick.
What’s the difference between a hooker and a cat?
I haven’t banged a hooker.
Day 70 without sex, my doctor asked me, "Are you sexually active?" I said, "Why, what you tryna do?"
What is long and hard and full of seamen?
A submarine.
I love eating Hisoka's big, fat, juicy c*ck.
Little Johnny is with his dad behind a garbage truck when a dildo thumps the windshield.
To protect Little Johnny's innocence, he says, "That was an insect."
Little Johnny replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"
Tell your mom happy last night. 🍆 in my bed.
My wife told me to give her 8 inches, so I had to have sex with her 4 times and punch her in the nose.
Why is my dick like a balloon? The more you blow it, the bigger it gets.
Is sex a joke? Because I don't get it.
So, no head?
Rob, you forgot to pay me for letting you sucky sucky on my thang.
AKA you're for sale.
Get a fucking life, you horny bastards!
"Jack and Jill run up the hill to have sex but in a text a sibling sayed I’m on a hill sleeping with a mex. foursome peace love and biches."
If God didn’t mean for us to have sex with 11-year-old girls, why did he make them so sexy and so much physically weaker?