Sex

Sex jokes

Cousin

    • My cousin said he wonders why people have sex with animals, and now I can’t stop thinking about it.

    Ol’ McDonald had a farm e-I-e-I-oh.

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    • Pillow

    • My woman told me that she wants to have sex with me, and I said, "Let's go at it." She said, "Shut up and kiss me on all my pillows."

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    • Sex memes

    Candy

    • Jack & Jill went up the hill so Jack could lick her candy...but Jack got a shock and a mouth full of c0ck cuz Jill's real name was Randy.

    Bisexual man

    • What is gay - curious 🤔 😳

    👬 👬 a gay man that is curious about experiencing sex with a 👨 👩 👨 bisexual man.

    👨 👨 👩 🚲 🚲 🚲 does it cycle now?

    🚲 🚲 🚲

    😢 😔 sorry for your luck 🍯 honey it sucks 😪 😞 😒 to be you.

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    • Brother

    • Little Johnny is walking in the hallway and goes in his brother's room and catches him watching something, so he asks, "What you watching?" His brother replies, "Nothing," and drops his phone. But then he gets a text from his teacher, who texted him a picture of her naked, saying, "After school come fuck me." So Johnny looks and says, "Ew, I'm telling Mom," and he ran with his brother's phone and showed his mom, and his mom said, "Ok, Johnny, I'll take care of you brother," and she told him to leave, and he did.

    And his brother ran in his mom's room naked, and his mom said, "Oh, that's big. How about you do what your teacher told you to do to her, to me?" And a few hours later, Johnny heard weird noises coming from the room, so he walked in and saw them (his brother and mom) having sex, so he closed the door and walked away.

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    • Anilingus

    • Why do heterosexual men and women that are married in France only perform anilingus on each other in their bedrooms?

    Anal sex and oral sex is against the law in France.

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    • Man

    • What can a gay man with a physical disability do better than a heterosexual woman that doesn't have a physical disability?

    Suck a big cock.

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    • Wife

    • Teacher: Can someone tell me the only living thing that can reproduce without sex?

    Little Johnny: "Your wife."

    Move

    • I've been doing sex moves on myself so I can be ready when I have sex, and by far the funniest thing to do is finger my butt. I go 2 handed sometimes.

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    • Mom

    • Your mom is the biggest tosser on the planet, yeah, you heard right.

    I don't have to strain myself a blood vessel and be wankin' solo anymore; she saved me a whole load of arthritis.

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    • Orphan

    • There was an orphan once, and someone knocks on his door and said, "Hello, son, come and hug me." But the orphan says, "Excuse me, who are you?" and the guy says, "You don't remember me? I'm your dad." And then the orphan says, "Fine then, if you're really my dad, come inside and let me ask you some questions." And the man says, "OK then, but I am really your dad." Then the orphan asked some questions to the man, and the man gets some of them right, so the orphan believes that the man is his dad. And then the orphan says, "You really are my dad?" and then he shows his dad his house, and the orphan has a roommate, and the dad and the orphan finally get to the bedroom, and then the dad knocks out the orphan, and then the dad starts to have something with the orphan/son, and the roommate hears weird noises in the orphan's/son's room, and he walks in and sees them having sex, and the roommate records it but then kicks the dad out of the house, and then the roommate shares the video to the orphan's school chat, and then the next day the dad gets arrested because he was actually a gay nonce, and everybody at the orphan's school calls him gay, but he really isn't, but since he was mad and disgusted, he pulled an AK47 out of his bag and kills everybody in the school and was never seen again.

    Btw this is a joke so don't take it seriously.

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