Sex jokes
When I masturbate, things cum.
When an old man does, no one cums.
If life was like Pacific Rim, I'd say your mom's pussy was a category 5.
Aaron and Ben meet on Grindr. They have a drink and have sex. They wake up in the morning in bed. Aaron says, "I'm so glad I got it out." Ben replies, "What? Oh, just the HIV."
Las Vegas has a new 550-foot-tall Ferris wheel, hoping to gain tourists.
What’s already gaining “tourists”? Whores.
Why are sex toys something to stuff in your asshole and not a big racecar?
What does your mother look like after I had sex with her eight times? An octopus.
If you go to the military and you get sent to a country, how many heads will you blow off?
That number is how many dicks you suck.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef!
I'mma flip this coin, if it lands on heads, tuh, you gotta give me head, if it lands on tails then you gotta give me the booty, so lets give this a try *flips coin* OOP! Would ya look at that, it landed on both, ESSKETIT!
What did your mom get for Christmas?
A big black horse dildo.
Why'd I cum all over your mummy's panties? 'Cause she's hot af.
LOLOLOOLOLLOL
A man walked into a fleshlight and died.
What do you call sex?
Making cake.
Pussy = drugs.
Nancy be like, "Don't do drugs, do cock!"
This dick ain't gon to suck itself.
<😏__ \ 👇 \ _/ 🍆\_
What do tofu and a dildo have in common? They are both meat substitutes.
Why did the dick suck my ass? They died.
Clit
I like penis in my bum!
Why did the penis go fly?
Because a girl sucked it too hard, it went flying away.