Sex

Sex jokes

Necrophilia

    • One night, I saw a woman sitting behind a dumpster. So I took her home. We talked all the way there. When we got home, I gave her a bath. Later on, things started getting passionate. We started doing intercourse, and some of the noises she made you would have thought she was still alive!

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    • Sex memes

    Rape

    • What do you call someone who hates rape jokes? An ugly feminist that couldn't get a cock in her mouth.

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    • Couple

    • A deaf couple wants to know when to have sex.

    The wife says, "If you want to have sex, squeeze my tits once. If you don't want to have sex, squeeze my tits twice."

    The husband says, "OK, if you want to have sex, pull my dick once. If you don't want to have sex, pull my dick 437 times."

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    • Justin Bieber

    • If Selena Gomez wasn't really single after Justin Bieber dumped her, I would wait for her to come by my house, take her fine ass in my room, close my door, and give her some sex medicine until she masturbates.

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    • Blow job

    • My sister told me she liked Medusa.

    I said, "Huh?"

    My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.

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    • Body

    • I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.

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    • Carrot

    • So I caught my girlfriend masturbating with a carrot. My first reaction was "Shit, I was gonna eat that later, but now it’s gonna taste like carrots!"

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