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Guy

3 views ·

What's handsome and smart, you can hear him and see him? It's you good-looking guys! So sad you can't read this since you're blind. Oh geez, I just found this website and I want to make people laugh. Too bad they can't see the joke.

Sister

5 views ·

Me: Sister, stop stealing my stuff or I will make you feel bad.

Sister: No, I won't stop.

Me: Fine, I'm telling the world what you did.

Sister: What? You will see when I post it.

Sister: WHY DID YOU TELL THEM I PEED ON SANTA CLAUS WHEN I WAS 12 YEARS OLD?

Me: BECAUSE YOU DON ́T HAVE A LIFE.

Penis

12 views ·

There was a man in a tower, and the other man thought it was a girl, so he said, "Let down your long hair." He said, "OK, I will let my big, super long, hairy penis down for you to climb and suck." Then the other man said, "If you have such a long dick, suck it yourself. See ya, b*tch."

Man

A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying. He asks her, "What is wrong?"

She replies, "I lost my family, my friends, and my home."

The man then unties his pants and says, "Then young lady, your day is about to get worse!"

Yo mama

1 view ·

Yo mama eat so much that she threw up a thousand times and said, "Help me, son!"

Mirror

18 views ·

If this is offensive to anyone, I'm sorry! Hey, wanna see something funny? Go look in your mirror!

Russian Forces

5 views ·

I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently, they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat vehicles and tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.

Phone

2 views ·

I was at my boyfriend's house, and I thought he was cheating on me. He was on the phone with somebody, and he said he'd be over there soon. So I asked him if I could see his phone. He said no, and then we fought about it until I saw his gun, and because I thought he was lying to me, I shot him, went through his phone, and his friend was still on the phone.

Cannibal

13 views ·

There are three people on an island. One dies, and the second guy goes to bury them. He comes back with deer meat. The first guy eats it, but the second guy refuses the meal.

When the men return to the mainland, they part ways. The first man goes to eat the deer again at a local restaurant. He takes one bite, then jumps off a bridge.

In heaven, an angel asks him why.

“Well you see,” he answered, “that man was a tribal cannibal. Delicious in my wife’s meat, though.”

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  • Orphan

    My balls when I see Tazzaro: boioioioioioing.

    Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

    Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

    Why don’t orphans play baseball? Cause they don’t know where home is!

    Microphone

    3 views ·

    Hello worstjokesever.com, I am not typing but instead using a microphone to speech, ding me a period.

    I don’t see what’s coming up, but I don’t know why I am sending, so it will be random or funny or just stupid, LOL. So like and subscribe and...

    Kid

    19 views ·

    Kid: Dad, what's a dark joke?

    Dad: Well, you see that guy over there? Tell him to wave.

    Kid: But Dad, I'm blind.

    Dad: Exactly, also the dude had no arm.

    Rhyme

    Grass is green. I am the queen. If only I can see you scream on the screen.

    Things that rhyme with green, queen, screen: clean, between, been, ...