Cybersecurity jokes
Where did the software developer go?
I don’t know, he ransomware!
roses are red, unlike the rest, I'm the one who has your IP address.
If a dog made a computer, it would have a mega bite.
To stop my password from getting hacked, I changed it to something difficult to crack: "StrongBrazilianNut111".
A guy who just got robbed says, "I've been hacked, and the hacker ransomware!"
Why do hackers in Africa have hard times dealing with firewalls?
They don't have water.
Women used to fear their nudes getting leaked.
Now it’s $3.99.
My local hacker contacted me and told me that he hacked my computer.
I responded, “Show me proof.” He provided the username and password for my email account, bank account, video game accounts, and social media accounts. To be honest, that is the fastest “Forgot Password” procedure I’ve ever done.
Bully: My d*ck is longer than your password.
Me: Sorry mate, it's so short, get a longer one! 🤣
*Enter password*
"ScoobyDoo"
"Password must contain special character."
"ScoobyDooFeaturingBatman"
How did Stephen Hawking die?
His computer got a virus.
Some jokes are best left not harassed by those who are offended by them.
For I have everyone's IP address.
If Red gets voted out, what happened?
Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"
Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"
Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"
Lime, Green, and Purple run.
Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.
Black killed Red. Black is the win.
LOL
Tech administrator of a school: Hm, a message from Google security?
Tech administrator of a school: OH SHIT!
Assistant: WHAT, WHAT, TELL ME?
Tech administrator of a school: WE'VE BEEN COMPROMISED, WE FORGOT TO SECURE THE SITE!
Assistant: OK, OK, THE KEY IS NOT TO PANIC... let's call the school board.
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
Head of school board: HAHAHAHAHAHA! That's a good one, almost as good as the one with Jack, Jill, and the ripped condom! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Tech administrator of a school: HAHAHA yeah I know right *whispers* you are playing it cool, right?
Head of school board: *whispers* yeah we're fucked...
TWO HOURS LATER
Important fat people in one room: OH FUCK OH NO, HELP PLEASE!!!!! WAIT, HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO TELL THE PARENTS ABOUT THEIR STOLEN INFORMATION!!!
AND SO THAT WAS THE BIRTH OF RIOTING TEACHER
Guess McAfee doesn’t clear all computer viruses.
