Science jokes
What did Pluto say to Saturn while barbecuing steaks?
"Mine is meatier than yours."
I like balls.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there were stairs.
What's Stephen Hawking’s favorite shampoo?
Head & Shoulders.
Do atoms eat booty? No, because they are too cool. ;)
Archer riddle has less atoms in his brain than he does in his dick, and his dick is 1/4 of a millimeter.
How does a mathematician get tan?
sin/cos.
Stephen Hawking tried to charge his phone and unplugged his life support.
Have you ever walked into Stephen Hawking's house?
Yeah, neither has he!
Why did tube date electricity? Because he would light up when she touched him.
Person 1: I heard oxygen and magnesium went on a date.
Person 2: OMg!
🌍: You're so hot!
🌎: How are you single?
☀️: I burn anyone who gets too close!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He had a computer virus!
My phone was at 10%, and my friend said it better not shut down like Stephen Hawking.
Stephen Hawking tried joining some music bands, but all of them rejected him... except Daft Punk.
Have you ever heard of a dream that that that that the universe was a fake machine?
How does the earth rate its sex?
Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.
If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!
Are you a professor? I have a theory about sex that I need to test on someone.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?
"What does this button do...?"