Science jokes
I got a call from NASA. They’ve reached your hairline.
Astronomers got tired of watching the moon rotate around the earth for 24 hours, so they just called it a "day".
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite band?
The Rolling Stones.
How do u know Stephen Hawking is having a seizure?
He spills coffee on his iPad.
I have been reading this book about zero gravity. I can’t seem to put it down.
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it didn't want to be argon.
Stephen's not dead; his WiFi is slow.
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water?
199, because the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real).
Get?
I wonder if Stephen Hawking has ever watched Avengers: Endgame... Oh wait, he can't.
If I eat a poisonous potato, it attacks my immune system and I die.
But if I poison a poisonous potato, then eat it, then I won't die because the potato is already dead and can't attack my immune system.
Say all the planets: Mars, Saturn, Uranus.
Henry jas Mercury in Uranus.
Why couldn't Stephen Hawking pass? Because he couldn't pass "I'm not a robot" test.
Look behind you, there is Stephen Hawking.
Nobody.
Why was the sun afraid of the ocean?
'Cause 7 8 9.
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
Runner beans.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl in the bathroom?
Because the P is silent.
What did the dinosaur say to the man?
It didn’t, they're dead.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite meal? His left shoulder.