Science jokes

What were the astronauts' last words before the shuttle blew up?

"What does this button do...?"

Why don’t scientists trust atoms?

Because they make up everything.

Are you a professor? I have a theory about sex that I need to test on someone.

Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.

She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.

How did Stephen Hawking die?

Windows didn’t update in time.

All real chemists know that alcohol is always a solution.

I did this chemistry joke yesterday, but I didn't get a reaction.

Hi 👋! I love 💕 you! Ooooooo!

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."

How does the earth rate its sex?

Earthquake, Cataclysm, Volcano explosion, Earth's core explodes.

If the earth's core explodes, then he got tore up!

Have you ever heard of a dream that that that that the universe was a fake machine?

I'm doing something Stephen Hawking can't do... pressing "I'm not a robot."

What do you call a person that can't operate a wheelchair?

Stephen Hawking.

What's the difference between Mars and Africa? Mars has water.

NASA stands for... National Adult S3x Association.

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.

Say all the planets: Mars, Saturn, Uranus.

You say to your slow friend: "Damn, you're slower than Stephen Hawking!" And that takes some talent.

Why was Stephen Hawking never trusted when taking a quiz?

"No computers allowed on the test!"