Science jokes
Ralphie: They put drugs in our medication?
Me: The medication is the drugs.
Stephen Hawking drove too far away from the wall and unplugged himself.
Stephen Hawking never wrote a book... it was a Dragon who was naturally speaking.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
Because his carer lost his charger.
Hey, did you know that Stephen Hawking predicted the end of the world?
Well, not really. He predicted the end of *his* world.
Why did Stephen Hawking die?
He drove too far away from the wall.
Where did Stephen Hawking spend most of his spare time?...
Currys PC World.
Stephen Hawking died because he lost Wi-Fi connection.
He drove too far away from the wall, and the cord unplugged.
The reason Stephen Hawking died was because his ethernet cable disconnected.
What atom presents TV shows?
David Atombrough.
You know how Stephen is smart, which class did he skip?
Leg day.
Did you know Stephen Hawking died in a game? The game was Happy Wheels.
He's fat!
What is, tyyyyyy a tree is it is the difference between a?
What did the man say when his girlfriend threw sodium and chloride at him?
That’s assault!
Did you hear about the volcano that was accepted into Cambridge?
It was a decision on the number of degrees it holds, which is a lot, because volcanoes have lava if they're active. And ours was.
How do you prevent a physics teacher from drowning? Shoot her before she touches the water.
Bro used the quadratic formula to calculate the velocity of your -234 going down hairline.
Yo mama so fat, she classified as a whole solar system.