School jokes
Seems very long. You won't remember the telephone number...
I remember it like this from school days in Ireland.
Dolly Parton is shopping for a new bra. A lady says, "Your size is 69." Dolly says, "No way, that's too too too (222) big." So she goes to the doctor. "Doc, I need something to make my boobs smaller." "Here, take (51) pills for 6 days (x6)," and so she did. Days later, she ran back to the doc, "Jesus Christ doctor, look what happened. I'm BOOBLESS!" 55378008 upside down.
Why do midgets need a lot of books at school?
So they can reach the top of the desk.
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
Why did the rapper become a teacher?
Because they had a knack for dropping KNOWLEDGE.
Why did the rapper go to school?
To learn his ABCs (All 'Bout Cash)!
always happens to me
Why did the rapper go to school?
To master the art of RAP-LETICS!
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.
I got kicked out of flight school, so I decided to learn from the experienced pilots (Isis).
Devora Malka, the Nora School, Silver Springs, Maryland, also known as Opal.
Teacher: "Do you guys want to get in trouble?"
Kid named Teacher: *
Why did the AI go to school?
To upgrade from "Artificially Intelligent" to "Artificially Hilarious"!
Ha ha ha. It is so funny. I hope you enjoy, fellow humans.
What is a snake’s favorite subject in school? Hisssssstory.
What time would it be if Godzilla came to school? Time to run!
Which one gets bullied the most, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
Why did the rapper go to school?
To drop some FRESH RHYMES in the cafeteria!
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
What's big and yellow...?
A bus full of kids.
Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."
Ben: "I’m not going to sit down. I don’t want to."
Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."
Teacher: "*stands up*"
Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.
The way to stop school shootings is to give children an RPG.