Scandal jokes
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy?
"Shhhhhhh, this might hurt a little."
What do you call a priest in a room full of naked boys?
A colonoscopy.
Three nuns are talking, and the first nun says, "You would never believe what I discovered." Intrigued, the others signal her to continue. "I found a phone in the priest's room," said the first nun. "Oh, that's nothing," said the second one. "I found condoms in one of his drawers." said the second one. "What did you do with them?" said the first nun. Pridefully, the second nun responds with, "I poked holes in all of them." and the third nun says, "Oh sh*t...."
Q: What was the name of Michael Jackson's last book?
A: The ins and outs of child rearing.
A priest, Kelly Clarkson, and Ian Watkins all walk into a bar... only for the bartender to exclaim, "We don't serve your kind around here!" Then he muttered in a low voice, "Fucking paedos."
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
What's the difference between me and Bill Cosby?
I haven't been caught.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
"Monica Lewinsky has gone down on Bill Clinton several times. What's stopping her from having a one-night stand with Donald Trump?"
"Trump is nothing more than a little pussy, don't ya know?"
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.
Who is Bill Cosby’s favorite Disney princess?
Sleeping Beauty.
What did the choir boy sing to the priest? Nothing, his mouth was full.
What would Bill Cosby be if he was white?
Innocent.
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid on his lap? "Just beat it, just beat it."
Michael Jackson and Tonya Harding got together back in the day for a horse racing venture. Tonya says, "I'll handle the handicapping, you go ride the 3-year-olds."
Michael Jackson was on a boat with a bunch of children. The boat captain comes up to him and says, "Michael, we've come into some trouble and the boat is about to sink. We need to get off the boat right now." "But what about the children?" The captain said, "F*** them." Michael Jackson responded, "Is there enough time?"
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most? The “cold and passed out” kind.
What's the quickest way to get money besides winning the lottery?
Leaving your son with Michael Jackson.