Scandal jokes
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
What would Bill Cosby be if he was white?
Innocent.
The media's relationship with Hillary is just like Bill's relationship with Hillary. The relationship is unwanted and forced, and they'll move on to the next person any chance they get.
Why was the egg runny?
Because he'd just had sex with Jimmy Saville.
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
How did Rihanna find out Chris Brown was cheating on her?
She found another woman’s lipstick on his knuckles.
Michael Jackson is happy when there are twenty-eight-year-olds.
Why is Jeffrey Epstein so bad at races?
Because he comes in a little behind.
Michael Jackson was recently sighted at Target. Why? The sale was all boys' pants half off!
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
I was sweating like Michael Jackson in a Chuck E. Cheese.
Michael Jackson and Jeffrey Epstein walk into a bar. But a few minutes later, they would walk out, because you have to be 21+. No room for those two.
What does Michael Jackson get high on? A little crack.
What does Johnny Depp hate about driving a car?
He can't drink and drive.
Why doesn’t Joe Biden visit children with cancer in hospitals?
Because he can’t sniff their hair.
Did you hear about the new P. Diddy meal in McDonald's? It's a 56-year-old meat inside a 12-year-old bun.
Michael has canceled his upcoming dates. They were Tommy, age 9, and Bobby, 11.
What is Epstein's favorite piano chord?
A minor.
Who is Bill Cosby’s favorite Disney princess?
Sleeping Beauty.
What is an Italian massage?
An Italian Catholic priest giving a blowjob inside the confessional booth during Lent.