Scale jokes

Your mama is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it said "Damn!"

There was this man, and he forgot about his wife's birthday. She was very upset and said that her present should come as fast as 1-200 by tomorrow. When she woke up, she saw a present in the bathroom. It was a scale.

When you went to McDonald's and sat down, you were so fat, they said, "TBC."

You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."

You are so fat that when you go out to check your letterbox, it measures 8 on the Richter scale.

Your mama is so ugly that when she stood on the scale, it said "to be continued."

On a scale of 8 to 10, how good do I look?

- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.

- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.

- Oh...that might actually be even easier.

What's a rapist's favorite scale?

C Minor.