Say jokes
Luisa: The ship doesn't swerve, as it heard how big the iceberg is.
Captain of the Titanic: Wait, what did you say?
3 minutes later:
Why didn't I listen to the strong one?
If Will Smith had a revolver and said, "Who fucked my wife?" Chris Rock would say, "You don't have enough bullets, mate."
When someone says: "You're a mistake."
Say: "The only mistake I see is right in front of me."
If you call the number 800-273-8500 in Afghanistan, they say, "Can you fly a plane?"
You know they're lying when they say, "My mom's picking me up."
I bet when 2 cheetahs race and one of them cheats, the other one says, "You're such a cheetah!" Then they laugh and go and eat a zebra or whatever.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
What did one candle say to the other?
"Want to go out tonight?"
News: Ook! says an interviewed monkey.
What did the South Tower say to the North Tower?
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
Say all the planets: Mars, Saturn, Uranus.
What do Emos say when they trick-or-treat?
"Boo-hoo!"
What did chemical 1 say to chemical 2?
"I think you're overreacting."
What did a car say hi to?
It said hi to the school.
What did the 3 say to the 8? Have fun!
What’s the difference between a mediocre thief and professional thief?
The mediocre thief will say “give me all your money!”
And a professional thief will say “sign here please.”
Q: What did the little girl say to her leper daddy?
A: "Oops, I got your nose!"
What did the daddy bullet say to his son when he missed the bull and hit something brown and gross?
"That is bull crap!"
What time is it when you say "what?"
Time to start over!