Say jokes
What do Emos say when they trick-or-treat?
"Boo-hoo!"
What happens when an orphan is told that someone had found their parents?
They cry...
They scream... with joy.
"Oh wait, no, that wasn't your parents."
Orphan grabs a knife out of the kitchen, lets just say, the orphan didn't live to tell the tail...
What did one candle say to the other?
"Want to go out tonight?"
Say all the planets: Mars, Saturn, Uranus.
What did the math acorn say when it grew up?
"Gee-I'm-a-tree."
Memes
You know that you f**k better than dad?
I know, mom says that too. (Typical Alabama Family)
What did the pelican say when he finished shopping?
"Put it in my bill."
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
What did Michael Jackson say to the kid sitting on his lap?
"Just beat it."
They say Disneyland is the happiest place on earth. Well, apparently, no one has ever been standing next to you.
What did the tiger say to the bunny?
Nice to meat you!
A bear walked into the bar and said, "Can I have a cola and a...whisky?" The bartender says, "What's with the big paws?"
I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.
What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?
"I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"
What do you say when the toilet is clogged?
Oh shit!
What did the zoo say to the snow ❄️? Get lost!
What did the traffic light 🚦 say? Oh.
What’s the difference between a mediocre thief and professional thief?
The mediocre thief will say “give me all your money!”
And a professional thief will say “sign here please.”
Nothing lasts long these days!
As Confucius says, "Hare today, gone tomorrow!"
What do you say after you throw an egg at someone? "Yolks on you!"