Saw jokes

I have a short TRUE story of how I found out my brother was gay and did "it" with his best friend.

When my brother was 12-13 years old, he fucked his best friend and I saw it. I was like 4-5 years old, UNDERSTANDING what "it" stood for at the time. All I heard was "ahh" and "mmm". The only thing that traumatized me the most was when my brother moaned "daddy". I was so traumatized that I told my mother about it, she rolled her eyes and said, "He's probably playing a game with Evan". BULLSHIT... NO YOU DUMBASS. He was playing the game "SEX", more like "GAY SEX".

I even told my father and he said, "I don't understand what you're trying to say". I told him DIRECTLY that I heard my brother say "daddy" to his damn best friend!

I actually got so curious, I opened the door and saw them doing "69". I was blank white after I saw it. I will NEVER forget that he did "it" with his own best friend.. NEVER forget about it.

(just a btw, I still have the image stuck in my head and never forget how YOUNG he was..)

(He ain't no virgin anymore I guess lmfao.)

(MORE STORIES COMING SOON =D)

"How was your day?"

"It was great."

"What was so great about it?"

"I saw a puppy."

"Awww."

"And I ran over it :)"

I saw a person raping a woman in an alleyway. I decided to help...she doesn't stand a chance between us.

Christopher and Tony were tempted for a beer, but they only had 2 dollars each.

Christopher got an idea and ran away to the butcher to see if he could get something good. He came back with a sausage. So they went to a pub and ordered 2 beers and 2 whiskeys.

"Are you crazy?!" said Tony to Christopher. "We don't have any money!"

"Take it easy now," said Christopher. "I have a plan."

When they finished drinking everything up, Christopher put the sausage through his own zipper and begged Tony to bend on his knees and take the sausage with his mouth.

The bartender saw what they did and threw them out without even paying. So Christopher and Tony kept doing the same thing pub after pub after pub.

After the 10th pub, Tony said: "I can't do this anymore. I am drunk, and my knees are in too much pain to even handle the walk."

"How do you think I feel?" said Christopher, exhausted. "I dropped the sausage in the 3rd pub!"

I saw a Black person riding a bike, so I ran back to my garage. He was still eating.

I saw a cute coworker and had sex in the back until I realized it is a family business.

I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.

Yo mama is so ugly that when Santa came to the house and saw a picture of her, he died.

I thought I saw a cool sticker on my office window, then I realized it was getting bigger and bigger.

I saw a homeless dude and gave him $1.

I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.

*True story*

I saw this guy with a very bad hairline who was painting himself blue and it said "Smurf Paint," but I shouted, "Megamind!"

Yesterday I saw an orphan kid playing GTA and told him he can't get 5 stars because he ain't wanted.

I saw a depressed kid and I gave him a lamp to lighten up his day.

Yo momma is so stupid, she saw an anime and started eating a live rabbit, and thought she would get powers!

Just saw the news that Kobe passed. I guess there's a first for everything.

I once saw a noose joke.

I wanna know how to make one :D

I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

Me be like: ;-;

You are so ugly, when the devil saw you, he said, "Jesus Christ!"

My four conditions:

1. I need coffee.

2. I need vacation.

3. I need food.

4. I need tape, axe, saw, bag, shovel, and an alibi.

Bro, I saw two dudes kissing LOL, but not regular kissing.