Saw jokes

I saw a news ad on TV about a dad coming home after getting milk. I said, "I've never seen that one before!"

When I saw your hairline, I thought you worked at McDonald’s.

I had to go to my friend's house.

I went in her basement and I saw taped mouths that are KIDS in the basement... Is my friend OK???

I saw a little boy sitting on a curb wearing rags.

I said: "Aww, are you an orphan?"

And he responded with "Yeah. What gave me away?"

And I said: "Your parents."

I saw my sister sucking a big toe.

When I saw you, it instantly made me cry. LOL.

When I saw your face, it instantly made me throw up.

This ole boy picked up a hooker one time and she gave him the clap. In a few days, he saw her again, and he went up to her and said, "Hey, you gave me the clap!" She said, "NO I DID NOT! I sold it to ya!"

If your sis makes you mad, so go to your friend's home to play.

If your sis is sad, go tell Mom.

Driving through the woods today, I saw a boy with a bare behind.

What did the tree say to the Lumberjack? Leaf me alone!

So, I was walking around the outside of the building and I saw a kid and asked, "Where's your parents?" I love working at the orphanage.

What’s the difference between a pornstar covered in slime and The White Stripes?

One has "Icky Thump," and the other does "icky hump."

I saw two guys wearing matching clothing, and I asked if they were gay. They quickly arrested me.

Roses are red,

Violets are blue,

I saw your mom beat you.

I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

Flex tape can fix a sawed-in-half boat. Then how the f*** can it not fix the Titanic when it broke in half? Tell me!

An orphan went up to Nikola Tesla and asked to travel in time. He then saw his parents put him in a building, saying, "You now live here!"

I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.

I saw your mom at work the other night. She was talking about how good she was doing.

Hands down, best $20 blowjob ever.