Said jokes

Your mini pecker is so small, the taxi driver said the ride was so short that he'd do it for free.

"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.

"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.

3 Years Later,

"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."

I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.

My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.

She said help, so I kicked her.

One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"

One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"

Hello everyone, I would just like to apologize for participating in the protest and everything else I said. I was wrong and have recently found a way to see all these jokes as funny. I hope that you all can forgive me. ALYA

I gave my sister a compliment and said she's pretty, then while she was saying thanks, I said, "pretty ugly."

Me: You are pretty. Her: Thanks. Me: Pretty ugly.

Yo momma so fat, Santa said, "Ho, ho, ho, I've gotta go!"

"Hi, plane," said the tower.

One day I went to talk to my friend.

"Hi John!" I said.

No response.

"Oh, yeah."

I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.

"Hope that helps!"

Stephen Hawking said there is no God.

2018 God said there is no Stephen Hawking.

Sauron said, "Eye see all."

My friend asked for something dark and creamy. I said..... "GU KHA".

As the car crashed, someone said, "I see a light!"

So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."

Yo mama so fat that when she saw Thanos and he tried to snap her out of existence, it didn't work, and he said, "Man, I quit!"

When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.

Your mama's so ugly, when she looked in the mirror, it said, "Viewer discretion advised!"

Last night I had sex and she said, "Stop talking about s***, OMG!" and I made her scream so loud she said, "Her balls hurt!"