Dating 101:
Here's what you do:
1. Dinner. 2. Kiss. 3. Movie. 4. Sex. 5. Bring her back home. 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!
Prince, I love you very much! Happy anniversary! Love you! ❤️❤️😘
I asked what was her favorite type of magic. She said, "the one you make."
You’re so fine that my zipper is falling for you.
A male unexploded landmine was in love with a female unexploded landmine, and he said to her...
"Hey, baby, we should bang sometime!"
roses are red, violets are blue, I'll be a jaeger, will you be my kaiju?
Girl: I’m so in love with you!
Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.
Girl: What’s the ijk?
Boy: I’m just kidding.
I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
Love that dress; it would look much better on my floor, though.
Are you French? Because I Eiffel for you.
Are you a keyboard, because I wanna tap you all night long.
I heard you were looking for a stud. I have the STD, and all I need is U.
Wanna ride a reindeer for Christmas? *rubs my antlers on you*
If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.
My crush said that she would rather die than have sex with me... It turns out that she was lying.
Why do women always have sex with the lights off?
Because they never like to see a man having a good time.
You know Hitler loves you when he comes up to you on Valentine's Day and he says, "Will you be my Valenein?"
I have a girlfriend.
