Dress

Dress jokes

Orphan

    • One day, I saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?" I said, "His parents."

  • 26

    • Nun

    • A man gets on a bus and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun.

    "Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you."

    The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her.

    "Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise.

    "Ha, ha! I'm the man from the bus!"

    "Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume. "I'm the bus driver!"

  • 32

    • Attire

    • What's the difference between a well-dressed man on a bicycle and a badly dressed man on a unicycle? Attire.

  • 3
    • Dress memes

    Zombie

    • I went trick or treating this year with friends. Good thing I dressed as a zombie...

    no one could tell that it was their blood.

  • 0

    • Queen

    • Yes, the Queen has died today. Can the people of the world please finally tell Harry to stop cross-dressing as her?

  • 5

    • Sister

    • Me: What did my sister do when she dressed up as Elsa and I gave her a balloon?

    You: What?

    Me: She let it go, let it go!

    Dog

    • "Dog the dog" and Maggie were frightened of her, and the kangaroo said that she had to be in a hospital with a doctor. Jokes and Maggie were walking. I was going to go off the road to the city hall to see her, and I said that the only one-piece dress for women readymade RB collection, as he was walking in the city, and Maggie was a little bit more on the side of it.

  • 0

    • Pee

    • A man goes for a pee in a haunted house.

    He unzips his pants at the urinal when a man dressed as a goblin chuckles next to him. "You got a small dick, buddy," the man says to him.

  • 2

    • Roast

    • "This dude right here don't look nothing like no damn Tyrese Gibson. He look like a hot, fishy tail termite all dressed in green makeup."

    Baby

    • A baby and his father are sitting in a street cafe. A woman bends over to pick up her keys just as a gust of wind blows up the woman's dress. "va va voom," the baby says. The dad chuckles and says, "Yes. I'd like to have sex with her too."

  • 2

    • Marathon

    • I was watching the London Marathon one year, and I saw two runners in costumes. One of them was dressed a chicken and the other dressed as an egg. I thought: "This'll be interesting."

  • 0

    • Costume

    • So, me and my friend dressed as dead people for Halloween. The only difference in the costume was that he was actually dead.