Romance jokes
Are you feeling down? Because I’d happily feel you up.
Why was the mountain in love with the volcano?
Because the volcano was hot!
If a man is willing to try his hardest to give you the moon and stars, then ladies, you should be willing to give up Uranus.
I would kiss your lips, but your legs are blocking the way.
If you know, you know. 😏😏
A man and a woman get married. The woman was a retired hooker. The man was a poet.
The man said as they did 69, "You taste better than my most delicious gourmet meal." The woman said, "Well, you aren’t too bad either, but the best 69 I’ve gotten and given was Harry. He did it for 24 hours nonstop." They got divorced that night.
I saw a cute coworker and had sex in the back until I realized it is a family business.
Jack and Jill went up the hill so Jack could suck Jill’s candy.
Jack got a shock because Jill’s real name was Randy.
Roses are red, violets are blue. Get over here so I can fuck you.
Summary of Twilight in one sentence:
Bella hits on two guys, runs away. Edward glances to Jacob saying, "Go Fetch," and suddenly Bella's his.
Tongue Trick Sex: The Movie.
Not coming soon!
Roses are red, Violets are blue, Lay on the bed, So I can fuck you.
Alicia: I said no already, quit it. You are thirsty, leave me alone creep.
Nathan: I wanna sex YOU.
Alicia: I LOVE DICK bud, you're *WEIRD*.
Nathan: WE-WE
Alicia: WEE-WEE?
Nathan: YES YES YES LETS FUCK NOW TAKE them panies off u said yes well in french but u said yes
Alicia: U tricked me I ain fucking u
Nathan: *SEX ME!! BITCH SEX ME OH PLEASE SEX ME SEX ME* *screaming saying it*
Alicia: *WEIRD*
Nathan: Dick ten inches and i geuss u cant call me *10 inched big long dick nathan* your lose
Alicia: WHAT NO.... wait? 10 inches yess
cauh!.cauh! ummm umm long dick goood unmmm couh coun ccccchhou
nathan: why do i have the urge to stick a chicken wing up yo pussy
cuugh umm
Did the sun just come out, or did you just smile at me?
I heard that the numbers on the front of your credit card represent the number of minutes until you meet the 💕 love of your life!💕
And the 3 numbers on the back represent the month and day you make it official!!
Comment those numbers to lock it in!!😄
Roses are red. I love hot food. If I was a bad bitch, I'd wanna fuck me too.
Oh wait, I am.
Even if there was no gravity, I'd still fall for you.
I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.
Had an amazing night with this girl, woke up, and it was my aunt. Now I’m in love.
Last time I got a piece of ass was when my finger went through the toilet paper.
EVERYONE:
"My boyfriend, Danny, broke up with me. Can some hot guy come, so I can interview them and see if they wanna date me?"