Romance jokes

If I don't get a partner for Christmas this year, mistletoe won't be the only thing hanging from the ceiling.

Why do women always have sex with the lights off?

Because they never like to see a man having a good time.

If your eyes were the sea, I would drown in them.

I could never fall out of a boat because I've already fallen for you.

I dated a furry once.

The relationship didn't work out, she was a cheetah.

This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.

There are 206 bones in my body.

When I look at you, it becomes 207.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Lay on the bed, So I can fuck you.

You got no lotion to masturbate, then you remember there's some leftover porridge in the fridge. 😌🤎😇

Is that a mirror in your pocket?

'Cause I can see myself in your pants.

I hope you know CPR, because you are taking my breath away!

Are you gay? Yeah, because I loved you.

Are you mixed? Cuz you're half fine, half mine 😏

I wish you were a soap, because I want you all over me.

I just went on a date with a woman in a wheelchair.

I stood her up, which made her fall for me. At first it was a drag, but now we’re rolling.

What do you call two AI systems that are in love with each other? Member of chat LGBT.

Girl: I’m so in love with you!

Boy: Me too. I think you’re abcdefghijk: aesthetic, beautiful, cool, determined, elegant, famous, hot.

Girl: What’s the ijk?

Boy: I’m just kidding.

Me: Breathe right now if you wanna date me.

My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.

"You're really hot, I wanna hit on you like the plane hit the Twin Towers."