Riddles
Student: A plane is carrying 204 bricks, one falls out, how many are left?
Teacher: 203
Student: How do you put an elephant in the fridge?
Teacher: You can't.
Student: Yes, you can. Open the fridge door, put the elephant in.
How do you put a giraffe in the fridge?
Teacher: Open the door, put in the giraffe?
Student: No, take out the elephant, put in the giraffe.
The Lion King is having a party, who isn't there?
Teacher: Let me guess, the lion.
Student: No, the giraffe, he's stuck in a fridge.
Sally has to cross a river full of vicious alligators to get to safety, she gets across safely how?
Teacher: She stepped on the alligators?
Student: No, the alligators are at the party.
Sally dies anyway, how?
Teacher: She frowned?
Student: No, she was hit in the head by a falling brick.
What has eyes but can't see?
Potatoes, storms, and needles.
Why are orphans not boomerangs? Because they never come back.
If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?
The dark.
What is the tallest building in the entire world? The library, because it has so many stories.
What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An envelope.
What is sticky, but it cannot stick a stick?
What do you call an orphan if every other orphan gets picked?
Someone: Ugly?
Me: No, trick question, they are still an orphan.
Why is an elephant big, grey, and hairy?
You have to tell this to a friend:
There are 30 cows in a field. 20 ate 28 chickens. How many didn't? A: 10
Who can drink 20 liters of fuel without dying? A jerrycan.
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple tree?
Apples get picked.
What is an orange cucumber?
A carrot, duh!
A collection of 911 jokes.
What kinda pizza did they order at 911?
Plane.
What was the color of 911?
Plane.
What is the fastest way to see 911?
Plane.
What fits neatly into a hole, slides nicely between breasts, and if used wrong could choke someone? A seatbelt.
Ok, so my brother made this, here it is:
Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken garbage!
Ok I know it makes no sense, but he made it when he was like 3.
What does CNN stand for? The Counterfeit News Network.
What has four legs and one arm? A Doderman in a playground.
Where is the most dangerous place for a human being to be?
In the womb of a woman who wants to abort her unborn baby. 😢
What do you call a binder with no rings?