What’s yellow and can’t swim? A bus full of children
what do you call a dog with no legs?
It don’t matter what you call it. It ain’t coming.
Whats starts with M and end with arriage?
Miscarriage Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?
Neither does the child
What do you call a orphans family reunion?
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant person?
A kinder surprise
What’s the difference between a amateur thief and a professional thief?
The amateur thief says, "Give me all your money!" The professional thief says, “Sign here please.”
What’s long, black and full of seamen? A submarine
What do you take care of after a car crash? The witnesses
Why are priests called father? because its too suspicious to call them daddy.
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope…
How do you embarrass an archeologist? You give him a tampon and ask what period it’s from
What is the worst motivational thing to say to a depressed person?
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.
What show does an orphan hate?
How did the orphan become famous ? They said “Go Big or Go Home”
- What’s the hardest line to draw in a hospital? * …
- A FLATLINE!
What pool never runs dry? The one on the Titanic.
What is the most expensive haircut? Chemotherapy
What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs. What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!
What do you call a singing laptop? – A Dell.