Religion jokes
Why does the orphan go to church? He needs someone to call father.
Twin monks who ring the church bells died.
Now they are dead ringers. :)
Rodd Flanders: What's "gay" mean?
Bart: Uh, it means you used to be afraid, but now you're not.
Rodd says to his dad Ned: I'm gay, Daddy.
HELP! HELP!
TELL THE PRIEST TO STOP TICKLING ME!
What's the difference between a God and my mom?
My mom exists. I mean... she did at one point! Unlike any "Gods."
I think that church is super burning 🥵.
When you tell the men in the suits you can see that the demons of your sins are watching you...
But they know you're blind.
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi? Because they can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.
You're so ugly that every time you look up in the sky, God says, "Sorry, can't help you."
One day, a class of children were killed in a bus accident, but only some survived. One was praying that he would survive, and the other said, "First time?"
When God said, "Let there be light," He saw your mum and said, "Let there be dark."
Why do orphans go to church?
Why?
To finally call someone "father."
To Drew the Devil,
We NEED to talk RN. I'm very mad at you, and we need to talk.
Angry Alex
Orphan: I finally have a father!
God: And who is that?
Orphan: You!
God: Who the hell is you? Well, it's not me.
Orphan: :l
Why do orphans come to me?
'Cause they have someone to call "father."
P.l.a.n.e.
Precious lord, are nonbelievers evil?
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!
One day I was at church. I had to sit down. I said, "Who in the world stinks?" I looked down. Turns out it was me, and this is not a joke, but funny.
God promised John that if he came in 1st, he would get an eternal life, but instead he came in 5th and got a kettle!
Who betrayed Cheesus Christ?
Goudas.